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Seriously, it kills me when I see people hold scientists up as pinnacles of logic and reason.

Because one time the professor I was interning for got punched in the face by another professor, because mine got the funding, and told the other professor his theory was stupid.

This same professor told me to throw rocks to scare the “stupid fucking crabs” into moving so we could count them properly.


thank you

this is one of the best comments this post has recieved

I have witnessed:

Two professors hiding around a corner and snickering, “Shhh, here she comes!” While a female professor approached and, when she finally found them, she proceeded to scream while pointing from one to the other, “You! I called your office but you weren’t there! So I tried to call YOUR office to figure out where HE was but YOU weren’t there!”

Two grad students standing outside a closed and locked door yelling, “Come out of the damn office. You haven’t left for days. If you didn’t have a couch in there I’d be concerned as to where you were sleeping!”

A religious studies professor apologizing for being late to class because, “security stopped me because I’m dressed like a hobbit”

Watched a professor snort the results of my experiment to determine if I had the right final compound.

Two archeology professors toss priceless fossilized teeth back and forth in an attempt to figure out who is smarter by “guessing the type of tooth and species of animal before it lands”

Multiple fully degreed individuals throw dry ice at one another in an attempt to be first to use the lab/get that piece of equipment/or change the iPod song.

A genetics professor build furniture out of stacks of paper and planks of wood because she is that far behind in grading papers/responding. One of the impromptu furniture pieces housed a fish tank.

I could go on but I think that covers the larger portion of the insanity…

Every time it comes around on my dash, it gets better.

(via entropic-introspection)

Source: ruingaraf
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I think these books tell their own story… of a friendship in peril

I can’t wait till March when Buzzfeed inevitably makes this into a listicle and is kind enough to send us a check for a portion of the advertising revenue! That seems like the sort of thing they would definitely do!

(via bookwar)

Source: ryannorth


okay i don’t know if this’ll work because i’ve never used tumblr from my phone before but you know how david malki keeps posting fake books that he says i made when really HE’S the one with the dumb books??  well i went for a walk to clear my head about that and i’m by the library now and behind it there’s these big piles of garbage and look what i found!!

i didn’t even think libraries threw away books but I GUESS THEY MADE AN EXCEPTION??

haha i always knew dave malki loved him some grumpy cat but i had no idea how much!!

hold on there’s some more books, one sec

(via bookwar)

Source: ryannorth



So as you probably know David Malki has been behind a Machine of Death game Kickstarter that went really well!  And now in the final stretch of it he’s dealing with fulfillment, which is a pain at the best of times - but he’s unlocked Hard Mode by choosing to send boxes labelled “MACHINE OF DEATH” to all corners of the world.  And some customs agents are looking at these thousands of mysterious death boxes he’s shipped a liiiiiiittle suspiciously.  I GET IT.  And it’s probably stressful dealing with that.  I GET THAT AS WELL.

What I don’t get is taking out your frustration on that fulfillment company by photoshopping up a fake book that suggests I instructed these people  working for him to be lazy, shiftless agents of sabotage??  I was trying to figure out why David - a man I consider a friend - would resort to such awful measures not as a last resort, but as a first resort, as a routine matter of course, when Jenn came running in, breathless, and said she found a book someone abandoned on the streetcar that would probably interest me.


I liked the photo on this book so I looked it up and it’s by Noe Montes and it’s licensed under a CC license!


Guys, if you are not following the Malki/North #Bookwar, I don’t even know why you have an internet

Source: ryannorth



Ryan North has had a lot of fun lately making up book covers about me and the Star Tracks, but do you want to know what I think?

I think he’s just jealous because he can’t enjoy a piece of media without obsessively noticing, and then cataloging, every usage of English grammar that varies even the slightest from some imaginary perfect standard he’s obsessed with! Ryan, you have a DEGREE IN LINGUISTICS. I’d think you, OF ALL PEOPLE, would take a descriptivist view of language! But just check out THIS TRUE EXCERPT from this book I found in an abandoned nautical library:

Scarecrow and Mrs. King, Season 1 (1983)

Episode 1:

1:31: Amanda King: “I’ll be right back thank you dear” – Run-on sentence.

4:22: Amanda King: “Man in the red hat…man in the red hat.” – Sentence fragment.

10:48: Amanda King: “You certainly will not!” – Sentence fragment.

16:03: Lee Stetson: “Champagne?” – Sentence fragment.

16:59: Lee Stetson: “I’m sorry that this is…” – Sentence fragment.

17:37: Amanda King: “I just almost did the dumbest thing with your package.” – Awkward phrasing.

27:31: Amanda King: “Valley Forge flapjacks, pilgrim’s peach puff.” – Sentence fragment.

And on and on and on like this for – according to the cover – every piece of fiction between 1960 and 2010!

Let me tell you people: the type in this book is TINY


Um, actually, the “who” versus “whom” thing depends on whether the person being referred to is the subject or the object of the verb, so without a larger context it’s impossible to say which is correct??

THAT SAID, this book looks amazing and I would be proud to have it on my bookshelf, much less be credited as author.

(via bookwar)

Source: davidmalki



Just 2 things, Ryan

  1. You don’t have to say “fiction novel.” The fiction part is implied by the word “novel”.
  2. Why is this book in the Port Authority bathroom

UPDATE: I have learned that it is in every Port Authority bathroom, so I suppose that answers #2, while also raising new questions


The way you can tell this is a fake is that my actual book was called “Space, Batman” and my other actual book was called “Space Dick, Tracy”.

(via bookwar)

Source: davidmalki




Chocolate Covered Candy Corn Layer Cake

Really nice recipes. Every hour.

I feel like seananmcguire should know this exists.

I really really really really require this cake.

Source: foodffs
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Frozen Peas from SuckUK; a fantastic piece of design as metaphor (as well as a super convenient way to make a spherical ice “cube”.

via Gizmodo

If you truly love me you will buy this for me.



Sphere basically take less energy to form because of SURFACE ENERGY. Sphere have a lower surface area to volume ratio. Because of this, ice sphere melt slower than your usual cubes. This is the reason at fancy fancy bars with those $30+ glass of bourbon or scotch may serve your drink using these instead of normal ice.

thank you nerd


(via obsessivelygalahad)

Source: theswindlr

"Roses are red / Gender is performative / Mass-market romance / Is heteronormative"

Source: realhousewives
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i was making a lot of mistakes and then my archery instructor said:

“you make mistakes because you’re focusing on the target and not on your actions”

and i was like woah

thanks for giving me the best life advice i’ve ever gotten

guys just think about how applicable this is to EVERYFUCKINGTHING

(via obsessivelygalahad)

Source: surimistick

"Under the present brutal and primitive conditions on this planet, every person you meet should be regarded as one of the walking wounded. We have never seen a man or woman not slightly deranged by either anxiety or grief. We have never seen a totally sane human being."

- Robert Anton Wilson (via liquidnight)

(via seananmcguire)

Source: liquidnight
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Here are some scientific facts about blood loss for all you psychopaths writers out there.

yeah, for writting..

now i am thinking about all the fics where a kid passes out because vampire and like how much can a vampire chug???

Source: adventuresintimeandspace